You only have one mother, and if you’re lucky, you’ll get to spend some time with her this weekend. And if you can’t, hopefully these ten films can stir up memories. These arthouse features from the 1970s forward pay tribute to all kinds of unforgettable matriarchs: British moms, Hungarian moms, singing moms, city moms, moms on the run. Wishing a Happy Mother’s Day to everyone. This one’s for Michelle!
‘Wanda’ (1970) – Directed by Barbara Loden
Barbara Loden wrote, directed, and starred in this gritty and evocative independent classic. Restored in 2019, “Wanda” refuses to sentimentalize its heroine; after waking up on someone’s couch, she shows up late to a custody hearing for her children. From there, the film unexpectedly veers in and out of several genres: a road movie/crime drama, while maintaining a direct focus on Wanda, an enigmatic character who resists easy categorization as a woman and as a mother.
‘Love’ (1971) – Directed by Karoly Makk
A claustrophobic and haunting depiction of an aging mother in denial about her son’s whereabouts. This Hungarian film is worth seeking out (I rented the DVD from my library), splitting the difference between an early black & white Ingmar Bergman melodrama and a guilt-soaked Robert Bresson two-hander. The mother-son relationship is central to the plot; but the connection between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law drives the narrative toward its heartbreaking conclusion.
‘One Sings, the Other Doesn’t’ (1977) – Directed by Agnes Varda
Agnes Varda’s singular saga is a sweeping celebration of independence, friendship, and motherhood. Thanks to Varda’s restless directing and two dynamic lead performances, the film sprints through the decades of friendship between Pomme (the singer) and Suzanne (the mother), without judgment or glorification. It’s a special film, an epic high-water mark of Varda’s storied career.
‘An Unmarried Woman’ (1978) – Directed by Paul Mazursky
Jill Clayburgh won ‘Best Actress’ at Cannes and was nominated for an Oscar for her estimable work as Erica, a newly-single mother living in New York City. Liberated from her marriage to the cheating Martin (Michael Murphy), Erica finds a new zeal for life, realizing she’s more than just the sum of her duties as a mother and as a wife.
‘Autumn Sonata’ (1978) – Directed by Ingmar Bergman
Ingrid Bergman and Liv Ullman are Charlotte and Eva, delivering a nightmarish mother-daughter relationship that was all the more searing given the very real and very harsh criticism of both Bergman and Ullman as artists and mothers. This was the only Bergman/Bergman collaboration, and it’s an essential entry in the Bergman/Ullman oeuvre, one of the great director and actor partnerships in film history.
‘Love Streams’ (1984) – Directed by John Cassavetes
Speaking of director/actor partnerships, the husband and wife duo of John Cassavetes and Gena Rowlands delivered a number of knockouts from the 1960s-1980s. This was Cassavetes’ final feature as a director (he died in 1989), and Rowlands is convincingly unrestrained as Sarah, estranged from her daughter and husband, and living with her brother Robert (played by Cassavetes). Sarah tells her husband she’s “almost not crazy” at a custody hearing; this could serve as the tagline for any of Cassavetes’ domestic dramas.
‘Secrets & Lies’ (1996) – Directed by Mike Leigh
Like Cassavetes, Leigh is one of the great chroniclers of domestic strife; and in this Palme D’Or winner he tells the story of Hortense, who finds out the identity of her biological mother Cynthia after the death of her adoptive parents. Cynthia (Brenda Blethyn) is a middle-class white woman who lives alone in a drab flat in East London; she is first in denial that Hortense, a black woman, could be her daughter. Blethyn was the deserving ‘Best Actress’ winner at Cannes, and this celebrated drama covers so much ground – adoption, class, race – delicately, without defaulting to simplified character tropes.
‘All About My Mother’ (1999) – Directed by Pedro Almodovar
This is not the first or last film Almodovar made that was all about mothers; yet it stands out for the superb ensemble of mothers (current and expecting), particularly Cecilia Roth as Manuela. It won the ‘Best Foreign Language’ Oscar; and, as with most of Almodovar’s work, has much to say about who we love and how we love them. Here, as always, the film takes no sides. It pays tribute to women, artists, and mothers, and those who have the audacity to be all three.
‘We Need to Talk About Kevin’ (2011) – Directed by Lynne Ramsay
Lionel Shriver’s novel serves as source material to this horrific story of a son’s descent into violence. Tilda Swinton’s Eva is a mother stretched thin, and Lynne Ramsay’s skillful direction keeps viewers on edge, while we await the inevitable tragedy at the end.
‘Lady Bird’ (2017) – Directed by Greta Gerwig
Gerwig’s solo directing debut was an instant classic, with inspired casting decisions (especially Laurie Metcalf as Marion, the mother), pitch-perfect comedic timing, and painfully real family conflicts. The characters here are as easy to love as they are to hate; in other words, they’re like family.
Honorable mention: Almodovar’s “Parallel Mothers” (2021), “Volver” (2006), Cassavetes’ “A Woman Under the Influence” (1974), Jane Campion’s “The Piano” (1993), Martin Scorsese’s “Alice Doesn’t Live Here Anymore” (1973), Rainer Werner Fassbinder’s “The Bitter Tears of Petra von Kant” (1972), and Kelly Reichardt’s “Wendy and Lucy” (2008).
