What director J.T. Petty attempted to do with the 2008 movie “The Burrowers” is to blend the genres of Horror movie and Western, a previously un-spliceable pairing. What the video game dialogue writer succeeded in doing with “The Burrowers” is create the absolute longest and most torture filled 96 minutes of all time.
Set in the Dakota Territories in 1879, the cowboys and Indians infused elements make the movie painfully slow – on par with almost every Western but not something compatible with horror.
The setting is good; Creepy atmosphere, middle of nowhere, isolation from lack of technology. The story opens with a series of deaths and the potential for an interesting movie. The Burrowers are a sub-species of humanoid that live under ground. With the depletion of the wild Buffalo, they have now turned to humans for a source of sustenance. They emerge through holes in the ground and drag their victims down in the darkness of the night.
And then…nothing happens.
Sure a posse of ranchers go out in search of the Burrowers and a family they have abducted. But its so boring, I’m under the impression Mr. Petty wanted the viewer to experience the dreariness and complete boredom that cow folk must have suffered through without the benefit of electricity.
When I heard the shrill of the infamous Wilhelm Scream I literally said aloud “Give me a break.”
The cast of “The Burrowers” is pioneered by three B-listers, all of which had major roles in the television series “Lost”: Clancy Brown, William Mapother, and Doug Hutchison. Mr. Petty must have placed calls to Matthew Fox and Evangeline Lilly to no avail.
The acting itself is average, though each member of the cast each employs an egregious accent, no two of which are alike and not one sounding as if it came from the era its unintentionally mocking.
Not an action filled Western. Not a frightening horror story. And not a good movie by any stretch of the imagination. Someone dig a hole, and bury all copies of “The Burrowers” deep within.
by – Matt Christopher
