Jeff Goldblum, in one of his earliest, most Jeff Goldblum roles ever is nothing short of magnificent. He plays the role of genius scientist Seth Brundle, who has created a teleportation device that instantaneously transports things from one tele-pod to another. And with his newfound love in the form of Geena Davis’ Veronica “Ronnie” Quaife, it seems like it’s all coming together for Mr. Brundle in a big way. Well, except that on a test run, he accidently mutilates one of his pet baboons. Have you ever microwaved a Hot Pocket for twenty minutes instead of two by accident? You get the point.
After making some tweaks and with the euphoria of his new found romance, Brundle really leads us to believe he hates baboons by teleporting another baboon! Seriously! He put another baboon in there. Thankfully, this time was a success. It’s crazy that a man of such intelligence, would see a fifty-fifty ratio as fool-proof enough to teleport himself. And God (or Huey Lewis) knows the power of love can drive man to do a many crazy things, but still… In his jubilation, he didn’t realize a fly got into the tele-porter with him; and when their molecules were broken down, they came back together…together.
Brundle – in his ignorance – believes to have come out of the tele-pod an enhanced human. Ronnie knows this isn’t the case – she spots black hairs on his back and his wildly insane “Plasma” speech leave her horrified. Brundle declares, “You can’t penetrate beyond society’s sick, gray fear of the flesh. Drink deep, or taste not, the plasma spring!” I mean, what in the hell is this guy even talking about? It’s so ridiculous it’s beautiful.
From then on folks, the beauty is gone. Ripping off fingernails, body parts falling off and the real reason Jeff Goldblum wasn’t cast in “Over the Top” carry us through this tale of grossness. The whole third act is haunting. Ronnie’s recently revealed pregnancy makes for one of the best scenes during which she has a dream she gives birth to a massive maggot. Along with the transformation of “Brundle-Fly,” this is honestly the stuff nightmares are made of. When attempting to eat a donut late in the film, Brundle-Fly vomits stomach acids all over his hand and the donut to which he says, “ooh, ooh that was disgusting. My point exactly, Brundle-Fly!
For those who haven’t seen this thirty-two year old classic, I won’t spoil the end but yeah, strap in and prepare to dive head into the plasma pool.
– by Joe Hughes
